Here:
5/8/2021
This is a bit more of an intellectual essay than a darshan insight, but I hope it is relevant and valuable enough to include here. Everyone knows their own inner state.
Five levels of suffering.
1: Those who suffer and don't know how to (down-)regulate it (whether directly by emotional regulation or internal dialog or self-soothing or indirectly by first carrying out, and second observing, your own situationally-adequate behavior such that it regulates the situation and thereby regulates the emotion). Tantruming children, decompensating adults, panicking fearful ones. This is called not having your shit together.
2: The "normal" people, that is to say, the well adjusted. What they do is they downregulate every experience to a tolerable level of emotion, and they do not permit themselves to encounter anything that does, or even could, pull them out of that "safe" zone. Freud's goal for therapy is here: a civilized discontent. It's tolerable, and isn't crazy-making, but it lacks aspiration and transcendence.
3: Those who aspire to transactional transcendence. After enough suffering or labor or achievement (self-measured), they will allow themselves to experience another quantum of undownregulated flow. These folks may never reach their own typically receding goalposts, may continue to punish and limit and emotionally imprison themselves (and others where possible) (since they burden their approach with a positive moral valence, which makes it even harder to release). People with a meaningful quest in their lives are here. Recall Michael Jordan falling on the floor in tears after winning the world championship, trophy in arms: he had reached his internal goalpost, and so allowed himself to experience some unregulated emotion. This is what meaningful achievement aspires to.
4: Those who recognize that release is actually unconditionally available but don't know how to do it in every circumstance. Even sincere spiritual seekers may never understand this, though many do. This level fosters increasing humility and openness. I'd say I normally reside here: still ignorant and bound, but my aspiration, at least, is towards unconditional transcendence.
5: Those who just do it. Unconditionally (i.e. always, everywhere). Look, there is no reason actually not to do it, so just do it. It's not even a doing but rather a non-doing, so it's not exactly difficult, and all the saints, sages, mystical traditions are suggesting to, and trying to explain how to. So even the morally accepted authorities are on the side of this. Here the immanent and transcendent goal is reached, made permanent, experienced as natural. So, unconditionally, yes, do. Tom! Do!